Emma Thompson told me she's never wearing heels again. Me neither.

life's too short to care about being tall

I’ve been thinking about shoes.

I missed the memo about high heels. I’ve never felt comfortable in them. My feet are a little wide, and a little flat. Anything higher than a low block heel left me tottering and in pain. Shopping for shoes was always worse than shopping for jeans. Nothing ever fit, or looked right. Shoes pinched, gave me blisters. Stilettos got stuck in street grates and escalators.

As a lawyer, time and again I found myself trotting to meetings after my male colleagues who comfortably strode at a pace I couldn’t keep up with in their flat soft-looking leather shoes. But when I traded my heels for expensive ballet flats or loafers I was told I needed to “dress more professionally” – as if my legal advice was at all affected by my shoes.

My whole life, pop culture has taught me that women are supposed to love shoes more than anything. Carrie Bradshaw treating them like her babies. The names we’re supposed to covet: Jimmy Choos, Louboutins. I felt like I’d failed somehow – the same way I feel about the fact I still can’t put on eyeliner.

But then I started to notice famous women making different choices. In 2019, Melissa McCarthy changed into a tracksuit and tennis shoes for the Vanity Fair Oscars party.

In 2022, Kristen Stewart walked the red carpet in heels and then immediately changed into loafers.

And then, my epiphany. I met Emma Thompson at the London premiere of her movie Late Night and she was wearing a stunning red silk jumpsuit and … trainers.

She looked AMAZING and that was exactly what I said to her when I had the chance. “I love your shoes!” She thanked me and said she was absolutely never wearing heels again, and she looked so gorgeous and it felt like a revelation. Like I’d been let in on a secret.

Turns out Dame Emma has been on this crusade for a long time because she’s baller. In 2014 at the Golden Globes, martini in hand, she tossed her Louboutins on stage – saying the iconic red soles were dyed with her blood.

In 2018 she wore white tennis shoes to Buckingham Palace to accept her Damehood.

Not everyone agrees with her (or me) that this is the future, and I know a lot of you reading this will be like my former colleague who, despite being told by her back surgeon she needed to switch to flats, said “you can prise my stiletto collection out of my cold dead hands”. And look, that’s fine! Fashion is subjective. Except when your place of work insists you have to wear heels, I guess.

I’d made my peace with it being my decision and no-one else’s when I saw a viral tiktok of celebrity stylist Law Roach talking about styling Zendaya. The interviewer asks about the actress always appearing in a So Kate – which if you’re not familiar is a 5 inch stiletto Louboutin that looks like this:

Roach describes the shoe as one of the “most versatile and the most painful”, and then recounts that Zendaya, aged fourteen, was collapsing and begging to take the shoes off and he wouldn’t let her, day after day, until her feet were trained. “Flawless,” the interviewer responds. “Needs no correction.”

Excuse me? What are we doing here?

I left heels behind in the pre-covid era along with hard pants, and if Kamala Harris can campaign for President in chucks and pearls, that’s good enough for me.

One day, maybe I’ll reach peak-Angelina and dispense with shoes altogether.

But until then, if you struggle with a tall shoe, I’m here for you. You’re not alone.

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Who wrote this?

This edish of culture vulture was written by SYSCA bestie Sacha Judd. If you want to read more of her musings on fandom and the internet, subscribe to her newsletter here.