fried, dyed, and laid to the side: a taxonomy of black girl magic on our screens

you are now entering the stan zone

Picture it. You’re in the South of France. It’s 75 and sunny with a cool breeze. You can hear the clinking of glasses and chatter in the distance. A table of moisturized Black women can be seen laughing, crying, and crying from laughing. 

You’re with your Hollywood girl gang. Issa, Quinta, Ayo, Ego, Robin, Ziwe, Keke, Zendaya on what will become your annual friends retreat where the agenda is in the name. Treat. Yo’. Self. 

This dear reader, is what I daydream about when I’m watching TV. The media landscape has changed drastically over the last few years and 2023 was the year of Black Girl Magic. Insecure, Rapshit, Abbott Elementary, Bottoms (and The Bear), SNL’s new era, Black Lady Sketch Show, Ziwe, and essentially anything Keke Palmer and Zendaya touched. On my screens I saw the women I wanted to emulate (and befriend.) They’re incredibly funny, smart, and fashionable. The only criteria I have for making new friends.

Of the shows I listed above, only 2 are currently still on the air (a travesty). Now why do we think that is dear reader? It can’t be because no one watched them - I can promise you I was sat for every episode I could get my hands on. It’s giving network executives meddling in Black folks’ business if you ask me.

When we give Black women the reins, only hilarity and perfection ensue. Let me show you. Exhibit A:

When I watched this sketch for the first time I howled with laughter. I had never seen Black women and Ball Culture represented this way aside from Pose (which gets an honorable mention even though it’s a Ryan Murphy vehicle.)

For Exhibit B, I want to give you a brief rundown of my favorite black girls/women and their portrayal in media during the 90s and 00s.

In no particular order:

Susie Carmichael from Rugrats: Both parents were in the home and their home was cool. Mostly because her mom is a Doctor who made replica Tiffany lamps as a HOBBY.

Jodie Landon from Daria: She was the voice of reason when Daria’s low self-esteem for everyone else appeared. Her boyfriend was Black too and she went to a fictional HBCU. I very much wanted to be her. I will be waiting with bated breath for the Jodie movie. 

Carly Tremain from Amelia’s Notebook: So, she’s a character from a book but it still counts! Representation was trash and this is who I had to look up to okay? She was Amelia’s new friend after moving and she was prepared to tussle at a moment’s notice.

Beyond these 3, I didn’t get to see myself in a character until Brandy Norwood’s Moesha and Angela in Boy Meets World. Micro-braids had me in a chokehold in high school because of Brandy. 

Now let’s dig a little deeper into Trina McGee aka Angela Moore from Boys Meets World. I loved Boy Meets World from the TGIFriday lineups of yesteryear. Angela’s character was introduced to the iconic crew in the college years as Rider Strong’s (Shawn Hunter’s love interest). When she crossed my screen I felt seen in a way that I never had been before. I grew up in a small town in Illinois and many of my childhood crushes were from the Caucuses Mountains. To see a cool black girl with a white boyfriend made me feel normal. She made me believe that I would one day find someone who found me as beautiful and interesting as he did her. (Spoiler alert, I did dear reader! 💍)

Moving into my own college years, Girlfriends filled another void for me. A group of black women who are all vastly different dating, working, and having a bomb ass time? That is exactly what I want out of my friendships. Having people who know you, hold you down, or call you in when you need it is a hallmark of a good friend. I of course identified with Tracee Ellis Ross’ character Joan Clayton, Esq - I talk a lot and my maternal grandfather was a Judge so I of course saw myself in her. Plus, she was always there for her friends (much to her own detriment at times).

And so, let me bring it back. We need more representation. Period. Let Black women tell their stories, damnit! In Living Color, Scandal, How To Get Away With Murder the list goes on for days. Black people want to see themselves in the media we watch because a culture vulture will always be waiting in the wings to imitate *cough* poorly *cough*. 

Dear reader, if you take one thing away from this please know that it is this: Watch Black media. Especially media MADE by Black Women for Black Women. 

And if by chance Issa, Quinta, Ayo, Ego, Robin, Ziwe, Keke, or Zendaya see this? Call me, let’s get lunch. I have ideas!

Xoxo 🖤

PS. Here’s the playlist we would listen to in the South of France. Bisous! 

---

who wrote this?
This is edish of culture vulture was a guest post by

My Life Is A Joke

aka Omo Ogbomo-Williams. In her own words, Omo has been clowning since birth and what you would call a “main character”. When she isn’t slaying the house down boots as a DEI practitioner, she is writing about the latest in pop culture, fashion, and music. She is not a serious person. Find all her stuff here xxx

want to be published in culture vulture?

if you’re a pop culture/ internet writer and you feel like you’ve got something to say that fits with our culture vulture vibe, send me a draft to luce@shityoushouldcareabout.com and I’ll see what I can do 𓆩♡𓆪